Over the past month I've been hit with two consecutive flus which fogged up my mind, cut off my inspiration and forced me to rest and recover. And whilst I was sick some pretty strong fears and doubts crept in - you know the ones that cause you to question your choices, your path, the whole way you've set up your life?
That's why I'm writing another post on fear, because it's so sneaky and pervasive in trying to stop you from showing up in your life that this topic is well worth another visit.
Fear is instinctive and protective. It loves to defend against uncertainty, potential risk and choices that have no guarantees attached. Whilst fear's true function against real physical danger is rarely needed, it still kicks in as if you are in serious danger whenever you move outside of the known sphere of your life.
Maybe this is why it's so hard to take steps forward in a new direction when fear is constantly pulling you back, making up worst case scenarios, causing you to doubt your decisions, your progress, your ability, even your worth.
If fear has been smacking you over the head with choices you've made or are trying to make, it's well worth holding it up to the sunlight and checking it out against what's real.
What's real for me is I have this big vision to help women show up and shine, because every single woman has a gift inside of them worth mining for the gold it would bring into the world. My vision is like a light in the distance and yet also within me, drawing me forwards. It's become a journey of learning how to trust, occasionally surrender and show up. I trust in it most of the time, when fear isn't working overtime to talk me out of it.
And yet when fear does takes over, it blocks out that light and makes me doubt it was ever there in the first place. It's so easy to fall for fear's ruses, because it hits you where you are most vulnerable - bringing up your most negative beliefs about yourself to put the breaks on whatever it is you're trying to achieve.
It might be my Piscean nature, but I believe life is far more interesting when there's a sense of mystery, adventure and a dose of the unknown involved, especially when so much of family life is set to a daily schedule. And this means occasionally stretching beyond my limitations, because that's when I discover I'm far less limited than I originally believed. It's the same for you. We are all far more powerful than we give ourselves credit for.
Of course your fear will tell you you can't possibly stretch beyond your limitations because you are far too limited to do that! It will do everything it can to stop you, showing up as resistance, procrastination, avoidance, doubt, starting up a conflict, second guessing and over-analysing everything to within an inch of its life. It makes you feel small and insignificant.
Please know this: your potential lies beyond your fearful self. Your soul is geared for growth and a rich, diverse experience of life until your last breath. Any self-limitations you believe to be fixed in stone are as malleable and expandable as your willingness to try new things and stay open to what else is possible. Which means taking action despite the fear you feel, because it's not real.
Perhaps you can relate to this?
Do you get close to taking new steps forward only to doubt yourself at the last minute and pull back?
Do you talk yourself out of what you really want?
Are you fun policing your own life, squashing your soul with too much common sense, stagnation or over-analysis?
Is your fear smothering you with its belittling stories designed to scare you back into submission and apparent safety?
And if you held all these stories, feelings and doubts up to the light, would any of it be true?
When we reality check our fear, we more easily spot the stories it hooks us with, the strategies it uses to put the breaks on, and we can thank it for all of its hard efforts, and get back to taking action anyway. And remember when fear gets really strong, it's extra validation that you are this close to an important breakthrough. So keep going and back yourself no matter what.
Please share with anyone who may resonate and feel free to leave a comment below.