How to apply your learnings to life's challenges

How to apply your learnings to life's challenges

I’ve spent years doing personal and spiritual growth, learning deep lessons in life, training to understand people, what motivates and drives them, what wounds them and how to heal from suffering. I’ve learnt about compassion, empathy, love, non-judgment, acceptance and respect and how important it is to cultivate these qualities in our relationships with others. 

But let’s get real. Compassion, empathy, tolerance, love and respect are easy to draw on when you’re around people you like and get along with. 

Be the change you wish to see in the world

Be the change you wish to see in the world

Yesterday at my son’s school, I saw this quote painted in blue on a wall:

“You must be the change you wish to see in the world”.  

Words spoken by a leader who was in full integrity with his message (ouch).

It made me wonder what this quote means to us today.

How to manage too much emotion

How to manage too much emotion

I’m a big fan of feeling emotions that arise, and yet when things are uncertain and we’re all feeling too much around too many things, some personal, some external, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and start to feel powerless within your own life.

Your emotional world can be like a jungle - thickly populated, with no real sense of direction. Especially when there’s highly charged emotion and fear in the air, which we’ve all felt in some way or another over the past week since the election.

Have you confused who you are for what you do?

Have you confused who you are for what you do?

I used to believe my work identity was who I was.  It wasn't until I didn't have a job for a period of time that I realised just how much I had derived my sense of worth and sense of self from my work. Without the work piece securely in place in my life, I felt lost to myself, less worthy a person, rudderless. 

Perhaps you can relate to disappearing into your career, relationship, parenting or a carer role, where you've become so identified with what you're doing, you've somehow lost your self in the process. You've forgotten who you are outside of the role you're in or maybe you just never knew who you were in the first place. 

The pull of the old against the call of the new

The pull of the old against the call of the new

When you're awakening without any real solid ground beneath your feet, it can be really helpful to get clear on what your deeper overall vision is for your life. Because this becomes your new anchor as you move forward. This is what keeps you in forward motion when the pull of the old tries to throw you back into your old self, your old comforts, your old ways.

For when you're changing and rediscovering who you are it’s so easy to get pulled back to who you were, like a giant contraction flinging you back into your old comfort zone - bringing up confusion about what's true and making you question why you ever left! It can be crazy-making to be in that in-between space, not who you were, but not yet fully anchored in who you truly are. We can get stuck there for quite some time.

Answering the call

Answering the call

I believe humanity is being called to wake up. Some of us are hearing the call loud and clear and wondering what to do about it. Some of us are responding as best we can within the context of our modern lives. Some of us have heard the call, and are actively sprinting in the other direction, too terrified to answer. And many more are not listening. Not answering. Not today. And definitely not tomorrow...

And yet the world needs enough of us to be fully awake, aware and willing to bring all of the intelligence, creativity, inspired ideas, wisdom, resourcefulness and courage within us to create the best possible future for the next generations and for our planet. 

How much pleasure do you allow in?

How much pleasure do you allow in?

Pleasure seems to be the theme of this month. As I've been exploring its many faces, it's become clear just how integral pleasure is to how we feel about ourselves as women inside and out.

So what do I mean by pleasure?

Pleasure is the capacity to feel and experience joy, warmth and love; to see and be moved by beauty of all kinds, to feel passion and desire, to be lit up by creativity, to be shaken loose by inspiration, and to feel the deep nourishing connection of others.

Release the pressure

Release the pressure

So much pressure to fulfill
expectations held inside
Internalised voices luring you
with their disbelief and judgment
Weakening your resolve to trust
in your emerging true self

Is the grass really greener?

Is the grass really greener?

Perception is everything isn’t it? How often do we assume the grass is greener for other people without having a clue what their lives are really like? And how they feel within them?

We imagine we'd be happier with a different job, if our kids were better behaved, if our family had less issues, if our partner watched less TV, if we had a nicer house, went on more holidays, had more money, more time, less wrinkles, less dimples ....

But would we be happier, more content, or would we create the same kind of situation in a different setting? 

Is your good girl in charge?

Is your good girl in charge?

Is the good girl in you running your life? Have you spent years being well-behaved, polished and compliant and now you're wondering - what for? What's the point of all this pretending?

I'd like to share with you a story. I once knew a young woman who tried hard to please everyone and do the right thing. She wanted to fit in and belong and was motivated by a deep need to be liked and to avoid conflict at all costs. She was exceptionally good at reading people, giving them what they needed and telling them what they wanted to hear.